still alive

i['m not quite dead yet...i feel close though...i cant go to bed until kt gets back and tells me what's up with church though....she went to see her nephews...i get to meeththem tomorrow they are 3years and 3 months old...i've seen pictures they are precious

moving was an advbenture we did ok though...kehb and i we online tonight athte same time and chatted a bit...i only feel like crying alittle bit...when i crewl into bed alone it will hit me....the only awkward moments reallywas when i first go thtere and Kehb wasnt expecting me to be ther to help...and at lunch when anna and ben started to hold hands fo rprayer and both reached for ours...and i didnt want to hold hands with kehb...jsut too personal too soon...but i'm not dead...yet....it may be too soon to get rid of the second part of my blog tittle though