4.30.2004

Embarrasing moment of the moment

I jsut fell off a chair in the computer lab. Literally hit the floor. I was tryign to sit down and got couaght on the arm of the chair which rolled out from under me. and I ended up on the floor. I am not sure that many people noticed. It wasnt a loud fall or aynthing, but i'm embarassed. I think i'ts cause i'm wearign a skirt...if i had been wearing pants i think i could have caught myslef. but i didnt. tha'ts all.

on a differnt note, yay for hte last day of classes!! even if it is raining:)

4.29.2004

Comments!

instead of reading theology, i took a break and added the comments feature to my blog. i encourage you to say hi at least once if you read this thing....im not sure anyone actually does....

the sound closet

The sound closet smells like boys. I am not imaginging this. I am also not saying that the boys on the sound crew smell bad. it's not like a boys locker room smell, it's more like when youre in an 800 class and a guy walks past jsut as you breathe in and your eyes open a bit wider and your heart beats a bit faster because he jsut showered, put on cologne and came to class...ooooh it's that sort of smell (sorry for my male readers who probly cant relate to my thing for cologne in the mornings :))
Thing is, i'm not sure WHY the sound closet smells like that. I mean there arent usually sound jobs in the mornings where they'd be in there right after they had showered. What, do they freshen up in there half way through the day? Like some sort of weird superman thing...."smelly boy ducks onto a closet halfway up te stairwell in Hughes and emerges suave, debonair, and smelling good!" Honestly, no one cares how the sound technician smells, so theres no need to freshen up before a sound job. I'm jsut confused!
I was thinking about this as i walked back from my sound job tonight and i decided i like the way the sound closet smells, it makes me happy. and i feel bad for the guys on the sound crew who probly dont get that kind of joy from the fact that the closet smells like boys. and there's only 2 girls on the crew so it seems unfair to the boys....I decided that one of these days, i'm gonna take some of my body spray up there and spritz it around. i wonder if anyone would say anything about the closet starting to smell like girls.....it's a thought that makes me smile more than the smell of the closet:)

4.26.2004

One story after another....

There's a story behind the title, but it's ot waht i want to talk aobut. If you want to hear it, it's not all that great, but jsut ask me. My family and my Dad's ministry have always meant "one story after another..."
but today i'm using that to say that it's jsut one thing afteranother...my day so far has been 14 hours, and i still have stuff to do, i jsut need a bit of a break before i dig back in....
I got back to my room after the first 13.5 hours of my day and my sister AmiDawn left me an IM that she was feeling left out cause i dont ramable about her....sheesh...i swear this is the last time I'm giving in to pressure and taking requests...
I love my Ami...she's cute...but she's also still living at home and i'm in KY so i dont really have that much to say about her...i'm bad a t staying in touch....she wouldnt like me if i rambled about her and boys;) (love you netts)..ok there we go i call Ami a number of things....netts....that's a deviation that started wiht Niña ... spanish for little girl..."girl" is what AlMeade called her at the hight of the "baby wars" (Ami was youngest for 9 years before we got Alex) Ami hated it...i was taking Spanish at the time and translated girl into Niña....which deviated into niñetta( a diminutive form of girl like "littel girl")...shortened to netta and then to nett or netts...actulally, Amidawn is also a name she aquired relatively recently...as in in the past 6 years....up till then she was Amanda or Manda....Alex (same person as AlMeade...my family has a variety of nicknames for everyone all used interchangably) couldnt/wouldn't say Amanda so he shortened it to Ami...and we had often added her middle name Dawn ( shes named after my grandfather "Don"...that makes me laugh at her sometimes) to Amanda or Manda Pre-Alex....so it was jsut a matter of time till we picked up Ami andadded dawn...she now uses it regularly....
nicknames are funny htings...Abi's roomate Rachel was home with her at Easter and asked aobut that, she had heard me called stazi tayma tay grace Gracia ... and Abi called BAZ and A-B-I ( like the letters spelled out rahter than as a word) and we call Alex Xander-man AlMeade, meaderman....ect...the list goes on....
the psychology of naming is really interesting actually..i love the meaning of names...maybe cause mine has such a good meaning (Resurection graceful, keeper of the safe place)...but when you shorten someones name youre kind of taking something tha'ts theirs and making it yours and giving it back...i'ts a kind of ownership sort of...a sense of belonging...a level of comfort........
SO there Amidawn...you got mentioned....and i wasted a bit of time, Now i must get to work....Finals next week and stuff that must be done this week:)

4.25.2004

A look into how i'm feeling

The Warrior is a Child
Words and music by Twila Paris

Lately I've been winning battles left and right
But even winners can get wounded in the fight
People say that I'm amazing, strong beyond my years
But they don't see inside of me, I'm hiding all the tears

They don't know that I go running home when I fall down
They don't know who picks me up when no one is around
I drop my sword and cry for just a while
Deep inside this armor - the warrior is a child.

Unafraid because His armor is the best
But even soldiers need a quiet place to rest.
People say that I'm amazing - never face retreat
But they don't see the enemies that lay me at His feet.

They don't know that I go running home when I fall down
They don't know who picks me up when no one is around
I drop my sword and look up for a smile
'Cause deep inside this armor...

Deep inside this armor...
Deep inside this armor...
The warrior is a child.

And i am feeling very childlike, but i'm also leaning on some amazing strength, this week is goign to kick my butt, but for it to totally beat me down, i know it would have to be bigger than God and He's the one i'm leaning on...

PeeweeAlleg05: that is a powerful song but it also implies strength in the weakness itself which it describes. Those that pick you up when you fall down, that is your family, your friends, me, God. And you have that-- that makes you very strong. “But they don’t see the enemies that lay me at His feet” and you know what that’s true, very true. Others cant know all your enemies. Even those who know someone best like your family or close friends or me cant know what its like or how it feels but... you can always go to Him and He will be there when you need to lay at His feet.

4.24.2004

words (lots of links in this post)

I think if i have a favorite website, it has to be dictionary.com I mean i waste a lot of time playing pass the pigs but for convenience, utility and entertainment value, dictionary.com has to be the best.
convenience and usefuleness i dont imagine you have much trouble believing, but entertaining? yes, entertaining! Sometimes i use it to look up a word or spelling for a paper or something, i imagine that's where normal dictionary usage ends, but i like to take it a step further, looking into obscure or outdated meanings, this adds a bit of zest to my life and that's where the entertaining comes in.
when i have the most fun is when i am talking to Brian, and one of us or the other doenst recognize a word the other one uses. this happens for a variety of reasons first being that we are both always crazy busy and so we mostly IM late at night so our brains have shut down already, another reason is that he is a scientist and i'm a communicator (not that scientists dont communicate but that's just not his field of interest) so we pull words from toatally different lexicons. (see there, that word came naturally to me, but most people will have to look it up, sorry i've provided a link to make it easier....) also another reason is that i'm a reader so i have a rediculously large vocabulary. becasue of this last reason, sometime brian will ask me the meaning of a word he has run across in his day and wether or not i know it i usually look it up to double check myslef, (i dont like misdefining a word, but i feel realllly bad doing that to someone else! and then he will sometimes look it up i dont know why he asks in the fisrt place sometimes, but i dont mind) at this point I will then make a joke aobut feeling used and the conversation continues, he'll look up a word and i'll look up a word, and much fun ensues.
lest you think that we are huge nerds (well we are, but not as much as this makes it look, actually hes a bigger nerd than me but I'm pretty sure that's tied to the scientist thing) a normal conversation continues while we are looking up other words, like i said earlier Dictionary.com makes my life zestier!!

4.22.2004

I'm lovin' it

Spring is here, the time of greener grass blossoming trees beautiful flowers new life and renewd allergies, and even though this weekend it has also brought incessant rain and dead worms all over the sidwalks, i'm not totally against it (just partly, its definately not my favorite season) but anyway, what else spring has brought is less clothes and more public manifestations of romantic affection. the title is a bit of sarcasm for you. I was talking to some guy friends last night abou the clothes or lack thereof that girls are wearign or not as the case may be...and it's a big deal to them...and that upsets me, consious or not girls who dress like that are beckoning more than warmer weather...and from what i can tell, couples are getting more talented...i'm good, but i dont think i can french kiss and walk at the same time...i wonder how long they had to practice THAT:)

boys!

I am mad at boys. I am mad at boys who treat girls like they're incompetent and unworthy of civility and patronize them just cause they're little and female. Last night i was setting up multimedia for a sound job. which i didnt actually do anyhting because the band actually had a really neat setup. "So, good" you say "you get to sit in the sound booth, do nohing, chat with matthew and get paid for it" yes that wasnt so bad. except that the guy who was running their multimedia stuff treated me liek an idiot. I know that this is not jsut in my head cause he talked to the guys there totaly differently. but ti makes me wonder do i carry myself insecurely, cause for the most part im very secure in who i am and confident in my abilities. but if im not projecting that then i guess i cant be mad at boys. but i hate to think that it's my fault that im gettign treated the way i cant stand to be. I cant stand to bepatronized and treated liek im incompetent and....and...GRRRR

4.20.2004

impressions

Sometimes, people dont know what to do with me. I don t think i'm that hard to get, but aparently i jsut come across to strongly random for some people. and im not sure why. my roomate ( i love her) says its because i give off this aura of petite, prim, and proper and then bust out something totally random and/or bizarre. this is true. the random part at least i can be very random, this goes way back "do camels lay their ears back when they're angry?" that was a great moment of randomness Em, me and the Risjan Boys...in a van on the way to the mall...sigh i miss those days
i am goin to bed i really dont ahve anyhting worth saying

4.19.2004

totally random stuff that i want to say

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MATT!!! my minion turns 18 tomorrow...i'm so old
my perspectives exam got lost...this makes me sad...i have to get and take anew on ethis week...like i need to add stuff to this week....ees crazy....it looks calm in thoery but hten you count the actaul free time you have and its all an illusion:) i'll be ok.
turned in our Media Min project tonight....yay for htat being done...i'm pleased with it...mostly....but im VERY pelased that it's done!!!!!
Ichthus is this weekend:) im excited....i work video crew friday night till its over and then again saturday morning...and i wasnt going to go thursday, i can use the time to do somew ork, but swithcfoot and reliant K will be thursday night...sigh...so i HAVE to go....i am exicted aobut switchfoot, and i want to see reliant K to spite my sister...shges a HUGE fan...hehe i jsut like to say "hahaha i go tto see them and YoOoOU didnt!!!" im such a mean big sister....i love all my little siblings....beign the oldest is great in a number of ways....and so rotten in others....
i like stale peeps....you know the marshmallow chickies that you get in easter baskets. i like them stale the staler the better....i am currently munching on ones from easter 2003...sooooo good
my roomate is wonderful....she brings me "mostly still warm pizza"...shes cute and twitterpated and she yells "I jsut want to say 'KISS ME NOW!!'"....she tells me im funny and that makes me smiley....becasue i know she is the funny one
my butt has shrunk no one is happy aobut this....some say they'd like that problem or i ocould have some of theirs...my minion says "Stasi, this is not good, if your butt shrunk you would have nothing upon which to sit"....my boyfrind yells at me, "well, maybe if youd stop 'Forgetting' to eat..." (i realy just forget, its not on purpose!) i discovered this unfortunate fact by startign to wear my summer stuff agian(its been beautifull down here, except the rain today) and saying things like hmm this skirt was higher last summer...and gee these pants fit differently somehow....oh well.....i am either going to read for theology class, i'm behind a lot, and i need a good excuse to lay in the hammock....or maybe i'll jsut go to bed....one or the other....you e-mail me your guesses and i'll e-mail you back and tell you if youre right....the link to e-mail me is right over there ---->

4.17.2004

a quick thought before i get back to working

"I need to start by acknowledging that correct punctuation, spelling, capitalizing and grammar are not e-cool. Deal, OK...and also my favorite written tool is...ellipses!"
Cathy Barker is a Wise Woman:)

And on a bit of a rant, i checked to see where the quarters i used to wash my jeans were minted...this is Brian's fault....also his fault, i have more knowledge about virus capsids than is healthy for any normal media Comm major....THIS BOY IS RUINING ME!!!

4.16.2004

wasting time :)

20 minutes left at work...lets see i could veg out and write in my blog which hasnt been updated in a few days or i could read some of the 100+ pages of Mass Comm, theology, and missions that i have due in the next weeks before school is over...hmmmm....considering i will go straight from work to dinner straight from dinner to OMS Fellowship and then hang out htere for a bit with the new cabinet members (yay for OMS & Cabinet!) and then go straight from there to edit my video project for Media Min. all night and well into tomorrow, and sleep will be cat naps on the Corbitt lobby couches while Queue edits or stuff renders....and tomorrow will be spent catching up on homework sleep and paperwork to turn in with this video project, i think i'll take a 20 minute brain rest....and catch up on my life every one who reads my blog....:)...it turns out people actually read my blog...who'da thought?!
really though ever since i go tback from Easter, ive not done much but work (classes homework and my jobs fall under this category) and procrastinate...i have discovered that more and more, procrastination takes all teh fun out of my life...because i have to pretend that im doing the work even when i'm trying to avoid it and if im not pretending to do the work, i cant jsut veg, i have to do something else...usually something that i procrastinated and avoided doing earlier....
but there's only 10 more days of classes...this brings me joy......except that it scares the bejezzes out of me on account of the stuff that i have yet to finish AHHHHHH *runs screaming form the room*
I finished my mass comm paer last night...origianlly it was due wednesday, and i forgot that it had been moved so there was stress in our room at 1230 tuesday night, as i ried to find a resarch article abotu mass media but then, i actually looked at the sylabus and saw the glorious circle and arrow pointing to friday....so i went to bed...wednesday i picekd th article and read it, and at 1115 last night, i started to actually write the paper....4 hours, 2/3 a can of pringles, and 1/2 a quart of lemonade later, it was done and i went to bed....got 4 hours of sleep a shower (I look soo good today) and came to the library to print it off of course ihad messed up mailing it to myself so i had to call KT about 8 minutes before class started and have her e-mail it again...oye!....but all was well....
Today is a glorious day in KY....I am wearing a tank top and sandals and capri pants....and i havent been cold all day!!! for those of you who know me, you know this is amazing....for those of you who dont, ask someone who does and they'll tell you this is more than my normal ammount of amazing!! Ihad time earlier where i had scheduled to do some reading but i didnt have to be anywhere specific so i laid on my stomach out on the green in the sun....aaaah it was wonderfull....its' going to be beautifull all weekend....but it's goign to thunderstorm on monday....i really dislike spring....except on days like today when it masquerades as summer...i love summer....i love sun and tanktops....and i cant wait for school to be over....i'll get to go home and see all the people who matter most to me....and then i have an exciting summer job lined up too, but i'm otu of time to tell you all about that.....who knows when i'll have time to sit down ever again......

4.13.2004

ALL TOUNGE IN CHEEK>>>DONT GET MAD AT ME!!

blogging certainly comes with it's share of pressures...like everyone and their brothers cat want mentioned....and in a positive light at that...sheesh....first it was my minion, then my boyfriend, and now baird...and he was already mentioned once...getting selfish here....a person cant write what they think the way they want...why arent i mentioned...why am i mentioned after the people on the bus...why is your blog full of typos....Where's MY water Buffalo, why dont I have a water buffalo...and Am i prepared to deal with that? I dont think so!!
but anyway... in an effort to keep the peace, here's a plug for my friend Bryan Baird:
DJ Grasshoppa
For Parties, Weddings, Whatever...
grasshoppergcc@technobeats.com
THat's that....
I had a great Easter Weekend, the sad thing being that i didnt get to go to the Sunrise service....VERY sad...i havent not been at the sunrise servie since i was FIVE!!!
and now i must stop and go tolunch wiht my roomate...i love my roomate

4.07.2004

you know what i love about this....the way when i go to the blogger homepage it says welcome back princess...i like to be called princess...makes me feel special....i am so blessed to have such wonderful people in my life...like my rooamte...she makes me smile..yesterday we wore the same shirt...not on purpose, i got up and went to a video shoot and she slept in and we saw each other as i was leaving the cafe and she was going to lunch...and we matched...hadnt seen each other all morning..htat was fun....i love my roomate, she reads this, thats not why im writing this thouigh....she commetned on my typos last night. Is it really that bad? I meani could go back and fix them, but that takes away fromt he spontenaity of my writing.....lemm know what you think..no really i want to hear what you think aobut this topic, the link to my e-mail is off to the right...jstu click and tell me what you think

4.05.2004

in case you care

jsut for the record.....that last entry=1,403 words

back at School:)

my brian read my last entry and was feeling bad because i wrote all that and didnt mention him once...geees youd think i went up there to spend time with HIM...the egos on some people (that's sarcasm for those of you who couldnt tell) I jsut had so much to tell from my trip that i didnt get to the part where i got to the bus station in Pittsburgh and looked and looked but there was no one there i knew...sadness...i had hoped he'd be rght there...but i only sat for a few minutes before i looked down the station and saw the exact person i was watiing for...and it brought me great joy cause he gives some of the best welcome back hugs...the kind with my feet off the ground and spinning...mmmmmmm:)...big smiles at even the memory...
and right away (as in in the bus station) i met John and Kim, who drove brian down to get me...very nice people..hung out with them a lot the weekend...I even shared slow dance with them the three of us for a bit....but of course im out of chronological order again...
the next relevent thing is the fun we had getting out of the parking garage....the security guard had to help..there were issues with credit cards and lack of attendants...but all was well....and i fell asleep on the way up to Allegheny....i couldnt sleep on the bus...at all....i was sooo excited...i read some..i did doze the last hour...but that wasmoslty becasue i knew itwould make the time go faster and i was getting impatient... :) it was ok though because brian did manage to wake me up and didnt have to carry me in....
all was well thoguh cause i got to sleep in friday but Brian had to go to classes...2 tests....poor boy i had him out late and then he had to go to classes and take tests....while i got to sleep in...i didnt sleep in tooo far though i got up and ddi some reading a litlle.....a very little...
then after brian got badk from class, we went to lunch and i met obscene ammounts of people...i dont remember half of them...and then ...then...hmmm lost track of my days here....
anyway friday afternoon ivolved a trip to the formal shop taht was having a closing down and seleing everythign quite cheap...and there was nap time too....College kids are so like preschoolers on some ways...naps is one of them...and then after naps...yay for naps...
btw...oreos and roomates are wonderful...and so is orange juice...but together they're not so hot:) ok end of tangent...
after naps we went and saw a dance thing....ARD...i think that's the letters....everything at taht school has letters...and they jsut talk aobut things by those letters...i dont quite have all of them mastered...but at any rate...after the dance thing wew went out to eat and then back to bed...the restaurant had REALLY good bread...and i finished all my food...yay for me...if i was 5 i'd get a star on my chart...yup, i had a star chart for finsihing a meal when i was little...took me forever to fill up too.....
back from that tangent.....so that was friday....but the best part of friday, you know that it was?....it wa sspending all the day of it with Brian....well not the all day...he had to take those test in the mornging...but anyway....
slept in saturday too....i dont remember when i go tup...wait i do it was around 11ish...again i spent the first part of my day alone...because of errand the boys had to run and the aforementioned initiation thinggy..which aparently went well and there are now i believe 11 new Delt brothers....right...or something like that
but then after we jsut hung oout in brians room and waited till it was time to get ready for formal...we looked at pictures from Europe...and talked to my dad...who ddint know where i was(thanks Ami)...OYE but that's too much of a story to type out...if you want to know really jsut ask me....and i did my haier up all pretty and brian got to get back at me for all the making fun of him that i did while he was tying and re-tying his tie (like 800 times) before the initiation thinggy while i re-started my hair at least 10 times....
but it all got done and i looked wonderful and Kim was beautiful...and my boy had a fun color changing shirt....and everything worked out well..i did ok at the formal....i couldnt be in the bar for long times ecause i couldnt beeathe cause of all teh smoke....i used to be able to not have a problem with that while i was working at the gas station....im not sure if im glad or sad that i cant handle it anymore...this weeken it was a bit sad cause i spent some time out in the dining area feelig a bit out of place cause oi didt really know anyone...i talked to a few people...i think they jsut felt bad that i was standing aorund like a looser...but they were nice people....
*tangent*KT and i wish we could live in Johnson....the boys have nicer rooms over there....and they all get their own sink in their rooms and we Like John Morley...*end tangent*
and then of course i left my purse at the place becasue im dumb....and Brian had to go back and get it for me....honestly that boy's so sweet he's likely to give me cavities!....
and out of chronological order again i near froze to death....it takes me forever to get warmed up sometimes...i had jsut waned up from waiting for the busse s when we had to go back outside....on the way back i did walk barefeet....cause my shoes were not conducive to walking back from the bus....and there was nothing really to them except cuteness to keep my feet warm anyway...i love barefoot!!.....
I love my roomate "there's an O in logistics?! wait spell that again i got lost at the O"
WOW this is really long....u are all really dedicated to have read this much....i feel special....ill make the rest of the weekend short...cause theres not too much left anyway...i had breathign issues saturday night after formal...but i'm ok...and then Sunday got up showereed finished packing and drove to Pittsburgh..there were INCHES of snow at Allegheny....wow!....lake effect stuff i love snow...i really love snow....we dont get enough down here.....
i got a bus seat to myself on the way to Colombus, and then rode with some guy from Lexington the rest of the way....we didnt exchange names, but we did chat a bit..jsut trivial stuff....from Colombus to Cinccinatti there was this scary guy in front of us...with really loud music in his headphones...and he ws crazy, but i didt realize that untill i tapped his houlder to ask him to turn down his music (quite respectfully) and he flipped out on me and almost made me cry....my seatmate and i decided we felt bad for Cincinnatti tcause th'ts where he was headed....but otherwise the bus ride was uneventful...and i got to Lexington, my rooamte was there and i got my suitcase from under the bus and we came back to school...
and life is good....today was of course long, mondays always are....tomorrow we start shooting my Media Min final project and i have to develop my film...
but that's the end of m weekend...i like that boy sooooo much...i miss him already....it really jsut whet my appetite, seeing him this weekend...spending almost all my time with him....i dont get to do that with Brian casue he's always hours away :(...but i'll survive he's worth it :) ....on the topic of being hours away from brian he got an internship in MD this summer....jsut when im gonna be in PA too...but its excting cause ti's a biiiig deal and im really excited for him..and he'll actually be pretty much jsut as close as he would have been if he was at School this summer like was another plan that now isnt happening...i looked it up on Mapquest casue im a big sap who's totally addicted to him...it's 90 minutes longer now...but that's not soooo bad i guess....ok that's the end of this super long entry....and im going to do some work and go to bed.....
and jsut for the record the bible does not say "what goes around comes around" no matter what 50cent says....

4.03.2004

@ Allegheny

I'm using Herman's computer right now...and there are boys running aroung getting ready for some ceremony or other...all I know is they're all dressed up nice...and im not really allowed to know what's going on...some fraternity initiation thing or another...whatever....all this makes little to no sense to me really, but wahtever...i htink im startign to understand why this is so important to brian though...and my it cant be put into words
it's definitely interesting being in a boys house...boys are so weird...that's all there is to it....
really I am having a wonderful time..i was nervous about meeting strange new people...and i have, but i'm ok with it so far...as long as noone really expects me to remember their names, it's not really fair, everyone i meet only has to know one name, and i have lost track of how many people i have met...
I left Kentucky thursday at 4..wellt hat's when my bus left, i left school at 230ish..and tha'ts the begining of my journey...i really should tell stories in chronological order...but what's the fun in that? huh?...none. That's what's the fun in that! At any rate...9 hours later i was in Pittsburgh...I love coming into Pittsburgh from the south, through the tunnel...and it' was night and all the sudden there's the city, all lit up and spread out in front of you jsut the way it should be...cause the tunnels come out of a hill overlooking the city...that's what i love about Pittsburgh, it's situated jstu right in the valley so that you can go up and see the whole thing all spread out....breathtaking really...i gsped when we came out of the tunnel, i had forgotten how beautiful it really was....i havent come into pittsburgh proper from the south in quite some time...
i met all sorts of fun people on the bus too....from Lexington i rode with Linda...she was a PK too...that was nice...then i switched busses and rode next to gina...she was nce but by that time it was 1030 so she slept the mjority of the way, i got lots of reading done....yay for me...which i ned to do some more of..i need to take a typing break and do osme reading..i'll finish my story later